June 27, 2011

The Thought Process Behind Facebook Birthday Wall Posts

Facebook kindly informs you that your friend's birthday is today. You feel compelled to write on their Wall. Here is your thought process as you begin typing:

"Happy birthday!"

But that sounds so impersonal.

Perhaps add a few exclamation marks?

"Happy birthday!!!"

Better, but it still sucks. Must... type... something... more... to make it seem like I care. But what to write?

"Happy birthday!!!!!"

"Happy birthday!!!!! <3"

"Happy birthday!!!!! <3 :P"

Ugh. I don't know what else to write because... frankly I've kinda lost touch with you.

"Happy birthday my dear. Hope you're having a good day!!!!! <3 :P"

Almost there. Tweak those adjectives and add some superlatives to give it more impact.

"Happy birthday my dear. Hope you're having a fantastic day!!!!! <3 :P"

"Happy birthday my dearest. Hope you're having the most fantastic day ever!!!!! <3 :P Do something special to celebrate! <3 :P <3 :P"

WTF. That doesn't even sound like me anymore. Oh well, at least it reads better than "Happy birthday."

So you think. All that fluff reads the same to the birthday boy/girl anyway. Unoriginal.


  1. There's a free fb web app that let's you pre-schedule happy birthday wall posts so you don't forget your friends birthdays. It's called birthdayFB. You can use it at http://birthdayfb.com